I have a wonderful student named Bruce. I'm really concerned about him though, because he doesn't seem to have a clue as to what he wants to do with himself. There's definitely something going on in his life that has been distracting him from pursuing his education.
As a mother, I've learned to be perceptive when it comes the communicative ways of the male species. I can see that something's going on in his world. At this very moment, he's using my desk phone to make phone calls. He's such a sweet guy, but there's some sort of gang activities that he's either a part of or has witnessed recently. It's interesting to hear his conversation because he calls EVERYBODY that he's been talking to on the phone "nigga".
He had been absent for about a week or so and I was becoming very concerned about him. I had been asking the administration about his well being and if anyone had heard from him or his family. No one had seemed to make any contact with him until his stepfather paid a visit to the school. I actually had the opportunity to meet him when I stopped by the office to get some bus cards for my students. His stepfather asked me, "Do you know Bruce?" "Yes!", I exclaimed as I extended my hand to shake his. The nice man told me, "I'm his father...uh, stepfather". The look of concern in his eyes almost brought me to tears because I could somehow feel his pain. He then held his head down and said, "I've been really worried about him. His mother is crazy and he's been staying with her for the past few weeks or so." I told him how much I enjoyed having Bruce in my class and also expressed that I really missed him and was equally concerned. Then his stepfather looked me in the eyes and said, "He's really a good kid."
I had an extensive conversation with Bruce (well as extensive a conversation as you can have with a low key, relatively shy young man). He had expressed to me that he was considering "just giving up". My question to him was why. He didn't know. Then I asked what he would do with himself if he just stopped coming to school, to which he replied, "I'd just get a job or something and just chill". He told me that he used to play football and basketball, but stopped. He also used to cut hair but he stopped that too. When I asked him why he stopped all these activities, he told me that it took a lot of time and that he wasn't getting paid to do any of it. I then inquired about if he was getting paid now that he wasn't doing any of those activities, to which he replied and chuckled, "yeah."
I have quite a few concerns about him because he's so bright. He's not really motivated to do much of anything accept "chill" and I can't help but wonder what will become of him if he decides to do things his way. As an African American mother of two African American young men, I understand what types of things young males CAN get involved in. Fortunately for me, my boys were never really attracted to the fast life because they were ultimately concerned about how I would react to it...and their consequences from me IF they chose the less undesirable path. I look at Bruce and see so much potential. He's really focused WHEN he comes to school and he's really good with History, English, and Government.
One of the last things I heard him say before leaving the classroom tonight is that he was meeting someone that was going to beat up someone else. That doesn't sound good. I want the best for him and he's given me something to really think about...how do I help motivate my students and help them realize their potential? There's something to be said about students that just don't want to be bothered and don't want to listen to wisdom, but there's also something to be said about someone that's seemingly crying out for help and just wants someone to listen.
I'm listening, Bruce. Ms. Sample's listening...
Friday, September 25, 2009
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
There's the Door!
"I wanna go home, Ms. Sample", was the exclamation of the night from one of my students. He was totally unmotivated tonight as well as last night and I had had all I could stand. Last night he had the same attitude and the same lack of motivation. Ironically enough, he came to my desk and demanded that I "motivate him". I looked him dead in his eyes and said, "I can't make you do anything you don't want to do. Motivation comes from within. I would ask you this...how bad do you really want it"?
He stood silent at my desk as he played with a pencil looking down. He seemed more interested in the pencil than what I had to say. Some time later, he exclaimed yet again, "I wanna go home, Ms. Sample". "There's the door!" I told him in a slightly aggitated voice. Soon after my comment my telephone rang. It was a concerned parent inquiring about her child's attendance. As I was speaking to her on the phone, I received a hug from my student and he left the classroom.
This student has missed many classes and had just recently come back to school for his "second chance". What bothers me is that he comes to school but proceeds to waste time while in my class. He does little to nothing outside of disrupt my class and bother my other students. I ask myself how I could have reached him, but by the same token, my student needs to be focused when he comes to school. He informed me that he wanted to go to college. I asked him how he would go to college if he didn't even want to go to high school for free. He just looked at me and said, "I don't know, Ms. Sample. I don't know".
My quest is constantly to help the students that want to be helped and try to motivate those that seem to need a little nudge. A lot of my students are beyond the traditional high school age, but not by much, however they still want someone else to do a lot of the work for them. They just don't get it and I'm trying my hardest to help them get it.
He stood silent at my desk as he played with a pencil looking down. He seemed more interested in the pencil than what I had to say. Some time later, he exclaimed yet again, "I wanna go home, Ms. Sample". "There's the door!" I told him in a slightly aggitated voice. Soon after my comment my telephone rang. It was a concerned parent inquiring about her child's attendance. As I was speaking to her on the phone, I received a hug from my student and he left the classroom.
This student has missed many classes and had just recently come back to school for his "second chance". What bothers me is that he comes to school but proceeds to waste time while in my class. He does little to nothing outside of disrupt my class and bother my other students. I ask myself how I could have reached him, but by the same token, my student needs to be focused when he comes to school. He informed me that he wanted to go to college. I asked him how he would go to college if he didn't even want to go to high school for free. He just looked at me and said, "I don't know, Ms. Sample. I don't know".
My quest is constantly to help the students that want to be helped and try to motivate those that seem to need a little nudge. A lot of my students are beyond the traditional high school age, but not by much, however they still want someone else to do a lot of the work for them. They just don't get it and I'm trying my hardest to help them get it.
No Regrets
I just got off the phone with one of my closest friends and she was in a rather contemplative mood. She was evaluating the choices she's made in her life and was questioning her judgement on each decision she had made. This was sparked by a HUGE argument that she had had with her soon to be ex-husband before she left for work tonight.
Everything happens in our lives to build character and mold us into the people we were destined to become...in my opinion. To me, there's really no point in regretting any of the choices made in the past, simply because they're in the past. You can't change the circumstances or the events to make things any better or any worse; you just have to learn from each experience. The good thing about experience is that it prepares you for the next experience and makes you stronger. It shows you what you're really made of, lets you know who's really in your corner, and shows you what should or should NOT do in the future.
It's really important to be open minded though, because it's not wise to harbor any resentment towards others or any resentment towards yourself because of the decisions you made at any particular time in your life. Be patient with yourself and love yourself. Mistakes are not bad things at all...they just make us feel a little uncomfortable at times. In the grand scheme of things, living life with no regrets opens your eyes to see the world through different lenses and appreciate all that you have. It also prepares you for all that you'll receive in the future.
Be thankful and grateful for each and every experience. Appreciate the lessons and learn from them. Share your experience with others to enrich their lives and share your knowledge in an effort to reciprocate information. You never know who needs to hear what you have to say...
Everything happens in our lives to build character and mold us into the people we were destined to become...in my opinion. To me, there's really no point in regretting any of the choices made in the past, simply because they're in the past. You can't change the circumstances or the events to make things any better or any worse; you just have to learn from each experience. The good thing about experience is that it prepares you for the next experience and makes you stronger. It shows you what you're really made of, lets you know who's really in your corner, and shows you what should or should NOT do in the future.
It's really important to be open minded though, because it's not wise to harbor any resentment towards others or any resentment towards yourself because of the decisions you made at any particular time in your life. Be patient with yourself and love yourself. Mistakes are not bad things at all...they just make us feel a little uncomfortable at times. In the grand scheme of things, living life with no regrets opens your eyes to see the world through different lenses and appreciate all that you have. It also prepares you for all that you'll receive in the future.
Be thankful and grateful for each and every experience. Appreciate the lessons and learn from them. Share your experience with others to enrich their lives and share your knowledge in an effort to reciprocate information. You never know who needs to hear what you have to say...
Friday, September 18, 2009
Today is a challenge...
"Come on, Ms. Sample", Elizabeth tells me. "It's Friday".
That statement has irritated me for some reason because my student is a 20 year old student that has a lot of work to do if she wants to graduate by May 2010. She has an IEP, which is fine. My problem is that she's not motivated to do any better than she's doing. My quandry is this: how do I help motivate her to see that she really needs to take her education seriously. School is a social environment, however, it is also a place where to receive education and valuable lessons that can be carried with you throughout your life.
My students like to listen to music while working...which is fine IF you have headphones. The problem is that not everyone can concentrate with music and singing going on. I happen to be one of those people. Plus, it's just common curtesy and respectful to other people.
My goodness...
That statement has irritated me for some reason because my student is a 20 year old student that has a lot of work to do if she wants to graduate by May 2010. She has an IEP, which is fine. My problem is that she's not motivated to do any better than she's doing. My quandry is this: how do I help motivate her to see that she really needs to take her education seriously. School is a social environment, however, it is also a place where to receive education and valuable lessons that can be carried with you throughout your life.
My students like to listen to music while working...which is fine IF you have headphones. The problem is that not everyone can concentrate with music and singing going on. I happen to be one of those people. Plus, it's just common curtesy and respectful to other people.
My goodness...
Thursday, September 17, 2009
My new life as a high school teacher...
I'm a new Spanish teacher at a high school in Arizona and I absolutely love it! My students have an amazing quality that demands respect, despite the global perception of the current generation. I teach night high school and my students come from a variety of households and backgrounds, but they are predominantly low income minority students with some rough patches.
I see the potential in some of my students that my teachers have seen in me when I was in school. I want so much for them to succeed and be the best students and global citizens they can be. They really have shown me that they need lots of support and that with the right guidance, they believe that they can move mountains. I'm so pleased that I have this opportunity to be a blessing to these young people and want so deeply to guide them into young adulthood.
I know that as a young adult the focus is primarily on the word "adult". There's a certain type of liberation that comes with coming of age. Responsibilities are brand new and the idea of coming and going as one pleases is exciting to them. However, what must be understood is that as a young adult, you STILL need help. Seasoned adults don't try to control your lives because it's a thrill for them...trust me we want you just as badly as you want to leave!
As a new teacher, my goal is to empower, not enable, motivate and not discourage, and to be fair but cool all at the same time. So far my students have informed me that I'm the coolest teacher they have and that makes me feel awesome because I have connected with them. I just want to make a positive impact on their lives...
I see the potential in some of my students that my teachers have seen in me when I was in school. I want so much for them to succeed and be the best students and global citizens they can be. They really have shown me that they need lots of support and that with the right guidance, they believe that they can move mountains. I'm so pleased that I have this opportunity to be a blessing to these young people and want so deeply to guide them into young adulthood.
I know that as a young adult the focus is primarily on the word "adult". There's a certain type of liberation that comes with coming of age. Responsibilities are brand new and the idea of coming and going as one pleases is exciting to them. However, what must be understood is that as a young adult, you STILL need help. Seasoned adults don't try to control your lives because it's a thrill for them...trust me we want you just as badly as you want to leave!
As a new teacher, my goal is to empower, not enable, motivate and not discourage, and to be fair but cool all at the same time. So far my students have informed me that I'm the coolest teacher they have and that makes me feel awesome because I have connected with them. I just want to make a positive impact on their lives...
One Giant Leap!
Today I have made one of the biggest decisions of my life but I'm not ready to disclose too much about it yet. I'm relieved that I finally decided to follow through with it though. Part of my hesitation is the fact that I'm bearing my soul to the world via the internet and I'm not exactly sure how I should divulge in the beginning of my blogging experience.
I've been through so much this past year since relocating to Phoenix, AZ from Raleigh, NC and I'm finally beginning to feel some relief...both literally and figuratively. I've been told for most of my adult life that I'm a strong woman and that's what people seem to admire about me. Through my eyes, however, what one considers strength I consider survival. I do whatever I need to do (within reason, of course) to take care of myself and my family. I guess I'm a strong woman, but to me I'm more determined than anything to have the kind of life I've dreamed of and to provide a better quality of life for my children.
I've always been pretty positive...an optimist and I love that because that's what really works for me. I've tried being negative and that just takes too much work! Negative people seem to flock to other negative people and my experience was that I just got tired of hearing everybody (including me) piss and moan all the time about their issues. I decided to do something about my situation and change my outlook and here I am. Please don't get me wrong and don't get it twisted...I never said that it was a cake walk or that my life had not been without challenge, but again, my determination pushes me seemingly where I need to be.
I promise I'll expound on my great leap in the near future, but for now, just know that it's awfully exciting in my world right now...and finally I'm getting a break and a fresh start!
I've been through so much this past year since relocating to Phoenix, AZ from Raleigh, NC and I'm finally beginning to feel some relief...both literally and figuratively. I've been told for most of my adult life that I'm a strong woman and that's what people seem to admire about me. Through my eyes, however, what one considers strength I consider survival. I do whatever I need to do (within reason, of course) to take care of myself and my family. I guess I'm a strong woman, but to me I'm more determined than anything to have the kind of life I've dreamed of and to provide a better quality of life for my children.
I've always been pretty positive...an optimist and I love that because that's what really works for me. I've tried being negative and that just takes too much work! Negative people seem to flock to other negative people and my experience was that I just got tired of hearing everybody (including me) piss and moan all the time about their issues. I decided to do something about my situation and change my outlook and here I am. Please don't get me wrong and don't get it twisted...I never said that it was a cake walk or that my life had not been without challenge, but again, my determination pushes me seemingly where I need to be.
I promise I'll expound on my great leap in the near future, but for now, just know that it's awfully exciting in my world right now...and finally I'm getting a break and a fresh start!
Why I Decided to Blog
There are so many thoughts that run through my head in the course of a day that it's overwhelming for me at times. As I sit here at the computer typing my thoughts, I'm thinking about the movie, "Sex in the City", where one of the characters is a writer and she types her thoughts on her laptop. I've always wanted to be a writer and believe that blogging will provide the discipline I need to finish writing my first book.
This is so very exciting and a little intimidating for me. I'm nervous about the responses I'll get, but also ecstatic about the idea of penning my thoughts into my computer in an effort to make room for new ones. (I guess it wouldn't really be penning if I'm typing, huh?) I'm also hoping that by sharing my life with the world, that I'll be a source of motivation for someone as well as the receiver of inspiration and encouragement from my readers.
I welcome open dialogue about most topics and will govern myself with the utmost respect to all who share their thoughts and constructive criticism with me. Thank you in advance for the opportunity to share my world with you and appreciate you being a part of my world, if only for a moment.
Until next time...
This is so very exciting and a little intimidating for me. I'm nervous about the responses I'll get, but also ecstatic about the idea of penning my thoughts into my computer in an effort to make room for new ones. (I guess it wouldn't really be penning if I'm typing, huh?) I'm also hoping that by sharing my life with the world, that I'll be a source of motivation for someone as well as the receiver of inspiration and encouragement from my readers.
I welcome open dialogue about most topics and will govern myself with the utmost respect to all who share their thoughts and constructive criticism with me. Thank you in advance for the opportunity to share my world with you and appreciate you being a part of my world, if only for a moment.
Until next time...
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