Reciprocity...my lifelong quest

As a little girl, I was taught to treat people the way you want to be treated.  For some reason, that advise has always stuck with me and I try to do everything in my power to live by that sentiment.  I love people the way I want to be loved, give the way I want to be given to, share with people the way I want people to share with me, etc.  There's just one thing I don't understand...why don't I EVER get back what I give?

Please don't get me wrong...I don't give to get, however, by the same token SOMETHING should be reciprocated back in some way, shape, or form.  Where is this coming from, you ask?  Why do you say that, you inquire?  Well, consider this an inside peek at Lennis Dionne Sample.  The following information is readily known to those that know me, and I want you, the reader, to get to know me too.

I love deeply...VERY deeply.  I love my family and my friends with all my heart and soul, and I've learned from a very early age to use the word "friend" with exceptional precaution because everyone is not your friend, even though they may appear to be friendly towards you.  I will do just about anything for my friends and most of my friends would do just about anything for me if they could.  I'm one of those friends that always remembers the little things (favorite color, birthdays, bits of conversations expressing something needed or wanted) and I do my best to let you know how special you are to me.  I'm very expressive and love surprises, so I often surprise my friends with random acts of kindness.  I listen to problems, issues, and concerns with a caring and constructive ear and give advice if requested.  (I also learned a long time ago that just because someone tells you things doesn't mean they want your opinion.  Sometimes they just need someone to listen)  I've developed a great sense of detail and am constantly developing my listening skills.

I've been told that my friendship is appreciated by many friends, however, this one person in particular has seemingly shunned me because I didn't see her or talk to her during my trip to NC.  There were so many people that I wanted to see when I got back to NC that I just didn't get a chance to see.  I was running nonstop from the time I landed in NC until the time I left.  Most of my friends understood that I was flying across country and may not be able to see them, but wow.

This situation bothers me because I was a really good friend to her and always kept in touch with her.  I expressed that I had a lot of ground to cover in a short amount of time, not thinking that I wouldn't be able to see her, for I had every intention to do so.  But what bothers me the most is the lack of understand.  The lack of forgiveness for not being able to see her or the lack of regard for our friendship over the years.  I take this as a personal slap in the face because she has remained friends with people that have truly treated her like shit, but I digress.

While typing my thoughts I've realized that I do have wonderful friends that do for me what I do for them in their own way, and for that, I love you.  One person doesn't determine the measure of friendship for the rest of my friends, true friends.  I guess when I'm not looking so hard for reciprocity I discover that it's been there all the time.  I would have any friends at all if reciprocity weren't there.